Mentoring Can Save Single-Parent Children

The dangers for single-parent children have only been exacerbated by a recession that has forced children in single-parent households to spend more time alone while mom or dad spends extra time at work.

According to the National Center on Health Statistics, single-parent children are at risk for a wide variety of problems in later life.

• Fatherless children are 100 to 200 percent more likely to have emotional and behavioral problems.
• Fatherless sons are 300 percent more likely to be incarcerated in state juvenile institutions.
• Fatherless men are 35 percent more likely to experience marital failure.
• Fatherless daughters are 92 percent more likely to fail in their own marriages.
• Eight-five percent of children who exhibit anti-social behavior disorders are from fatherless homes.

One expert, who was mentored himself at an early age, believes that mentoring - from inside or outside of a child's family - can help fill the gaps for children in single-parent households.

"Children in their formative years are looking for direction from an adult in their life," said Paul Hansen, author of Turnaround Summer from Book Publisher's Network (www.turnaroundsummer.com). "This guidance should preferably come from a parent, but the real qualification is that it be from someone who always listens closely, reinforces positive actions, and with guidance encourages kids to go beyond their comfort zone. Young minds are curious and need direction, discipline and an outlet for their creativity. And this is not just a single-parent family phenomenon. Traditional families, caught by the stresses of making ends meet and a faster-paced life, experience similar issues, so their children could benefit from mentoring, as well."

Hansen understands that concept from experience, having been mentored at a time in his life when he was heading down the wrong path.

"I lived this, and I speak from first hand experience about the power of that turnaround summer," he said. "I was taken out in the wilderness and taught how to survive off the land. I didn't realize about the conditions, about the fact that I was totally in for a surprise or, better yet, a shock about how survival in the wilderness takes place. That experience changed my life and paved the way for me to be successful in business and in life. It taught me what it really took to be a man, a husband and a provider."

That shock turned to understanding when Hansen saw that the survival training was a metaphor for life.

"That summer, I learned how a structured family goes about the daily routines of farm life, how to make a living with the skills of an outdoorsman, how to treat people that depend on you with respect, and most of all, that we affect the people in our lives by what we do or do not do," he said. "Children need a positive influence at this time in their lives. They will engage that which is present around them in an attempt to build self esteem, a sense of belonging, and to rise up in knowledge - good or bad - whatever the environment around them has to offer."


Rachel Friedman is a staff writer for News & Experts.